Sad...Down..
Hurm..lama dah x update blog ne..busy sgt..smpi xde masa..tp ntah napa malam ne rasa nak tulis je..maybe sebab x dapat tidur kot..dah makan ubat tapi xle juga..mayb terlalu stress..tmbah2 lagi malam ne minggu exam..nanti lah time cuti kemas2 sket blog ne..dah bersawang dah..maybe i shud tukar the layout..macam ada problem..well,many things happen lately..banyak benda yg me rasa terlalu cepat berlaku..im feeling weak..it happen too fast..
yup,this happen becoz of my own mistakes..i do regrets..a lots..i dont know maself how this thing happen..i thought we are strong enough to face watever problems that would come to us..but I was wrong..I dont know..I do really LOVE her..but I seem dont understand..maybe I hurt her a lots already untill she cant bear it anymore..maybe the distance between us are taking it toll on us..yes,I do care bout her when I was seem not care or busy..I thought she would understand..or maybe it just my own assumption..I am really sorie..but sorrie cant change anything anymore...oh God im helpless...aku hilang arah..my love is only for her..I do try to meet you..but it just that I dont the chances at the right time..I do wanna be by yourside..I do wanna be one to shed ur tear when u r down...
but now things happen..I guess im not ready for it..I guess maybe I love her too much..I guess because she is my life..I guess because she is everything for me..FRIEND FOR NOW..BREAk..the word struck my heart..I can stop crying..I dont want to cry..but the tear fall itself..because the tears are proof of how much i love her..to know that she is gonna be a friend only..it hurt..I wish I can stop this..but I cant..my heart keep on saying that if I love her I should let her do what she want..but deep in my heart I dont want to lose her..I really LOVE her..words cant describe how much i love her..
now..it seem that i hardly can reach her..day by day she seem become far and far away from me..Every moment I keep on thinking..what she is doing now?..thingkin of me..i cant focus..im lost...yup im lost..i feel like im nobody..everythings seem goin wrong around me..lyk a wilted plant..I really do need her..but maybe she need more time..i dont know..maybe I hurt too much that im better this way..a mistake that i cant redo..i know im not perfect..but at least i try to be the best i can..give all my love too her...to be faithfull..
what can i do..im helpless..all I know now is I do really love her..Im sorie that i keep callin u the other day..i just need u..but u said u rimas..kadang u nda cakap pn..me terasa..mayb im annoying time tue..or maybe me ne mmg teruk sgt..sorie..for now me dah x kacau u kan..sorie..it just that i dont know who to find anymore..but no worry..now im trying to throw the hp far away from me..everytime i feel like i wanna kol u i said to myself maybe i shud not now..im afraid u will said it again..god,im start to crying now..
I really <3 u Nur Fitrah Serakan..from the bottom of my heart..the one,the first,the last and the only one that i trully love...
